Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Darters

Darters are a type of small freshwater fish similar to perch that can be found in freshwater streams throughout North America.

GoPurePet Always Keeps Your Pet’s Water Clean and Fresh

One new product at Superzoo we love is the GoPurePet, a companion product to the GoPurePod, and a winner when it comes to keeping our pets'' water germ-free!

Top 10 Howlarious Dog Halloween Costumes

This year, I went looking for the coolest, rib-tickling dog Halloween costumes you can buy (online to boot!) and have delivered right to your door.

Danios

Danios are a popular species of freshwater fish in the aquarium hobby. They are characterized by two pairs of long barbells that hang from their mouth.

Labrahuahua

The Labrahuahua shares the gentle Labrador Retriever nature and the spunky Chihuahua attitude. A friendly dog who loves to find a cozy place to snooze.

Blind Service Dog’s Smile Brightens The Lives Of Others

Born without sight, Smiley serves up a smile and hope to those who need it most. Bright and perky therapy dogs are a common sight at many nursing homes. They…

Goldador

Also known as Golden Labradors, the Goldador is a hybrid of two of the most popular dogs in North America. Ideal for a wide range of families and lifestyles

LaPerm

Elegant and athletic, the active LaPerm is also an excellent lap cat with an affectionate, gregarious, and inquisitive nature. They make superb family pets.

5 Must-Read Books When Training A Dog

What dog training books would you find on the shelves of a dog trainer? Our resident dog trainer offers some suggestions on essential reads for pet parents.

Enderby Island Rabbit

The Enderby Island Rabbit is a rare and endangered breed. Enderby Rabbits are prone to being skittish, but can be socialized.

Dream Job Contest: Slovenian Castle Is Looking For Dog (And Owner) Car

The winner of this contest will be living large with their dog in a real Slovenian Castle… with a salary to match the lifestyle Is your dog looking fo…

5 Benefits Of Using Homemade Dog Cleaning Products

Store-bought household cleaning products can lead to serious side effects for your dog. Get rid of toxic chemicals and enjoy the benefits of DIY cleaners.

Bestselling Author Offers Giveaway In Support Of The Beagle Freedom Pr

For a limited time, author and cancer-survivor Teresa Rhyne gives you something extra special when you order her new book In 2012 author Teresa Rhyne gave th…

Schwyz Hound

Also known as the Schweizer Laufhund, the Schwyz hound is one of three Swiss hounds. This is a small hound used for hunting hare, fox, and roe deer.

Catfish

Catfish are a large family of freshwater fish extremely popular in the aquarium trade. Extremely hardy and make for fascinating aquarium specimens.