Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

U.S. Senators Introduce Legislation To Protect Pets In Air

Policy changes regarding the transportation of pets have been proposed by two U.S. Senators after the tragic death of a puppy on United Airlines.

Peagle

The Peagle is a cross between a purebred Beagle and Pekingese. These dogs are affectionate and smart dogs that enjoy playing and learning new commands.

Top 10 Picks From SuperZoo 2014

Was it ever hot this year at SuperZoo 2014 in Las Vegas – and I’m not just talking about the weather. This pet industry trade show was packed…

How To Stop A Puppy From Biting

Puppies love to bite. Those tiny, razor-sharp teeth are a part of a pup''s bite inhibition. Here are a few tips for how to stop a puppy from biting.

Ask The Hairy Dogfathers: Can You Return A Surprise Puppy Present?

One reason why you should NEVER give a puppy as a surprise present - the receiver may not want it! Advice on dealing with a gift that can''t be returned.

Toronto’s First Upscale Dog Resort Opens To Wagging Reviews

Park9 is where you’ll find all the hip Canadian dogs enjoying the finer things in life – like a pool, 5-star sleeping accommodations and luxe spa…

5 Easy Tips to Discourage Cats From Jumping on Counters

When it comes to curtailing our curious cats, we need to take a look at not only how we can stop them but also at why they’re doing it in the first place.

Best Dog Hoodies

Dog hoodies are not just a fashion statement for trendy canines: they keep your pet warm and snug when it''s cold outside.

Gold Paw Series Stretch Fleece Pullover A Perfect Fit For Chilly Dogs

A super soft pullover that will keep your dog toasty this winter The temperature has started to drop and we’ve even seen a few snowflakes around here (…

Arowana

Sometimes referred to as the dragon fish, arowana fish are one of the most beautiful and most fascinating species of fish in the aquarium trade.

Cat Bringing You Dead Animals as Gifts? Artificial Intelligence Will B

The use of artificial intelligence in the pet industry is slowly but surely gaining more ground: this AI-powered cat flap just proves it.

4 Blissful Tips On How To Include A Dog In Your Wedding

Here comes the bride… and her dog! There’s no reason why your pooch can’t be part of your special day. Your wedding day is said to be the…

Kickstarter’s PAWD Is The Prettiest Crate You’ll Ever See

This re-envisioned dog crate for pampered pooches is stylish, functional and cozy, and its sleek design ensures it fits right into any modern home.

Upside Down Dog Of The Week – Oscar

Say hello to Oscar, our Upside Down Dog of the Week from Upsidedowndogs.com. Oscar is a 5-year-old male English Labrador Retriever from Ottawa, Ontario, Cana…

Cranberry Pumpkin Christmas Dog Treat Recipe

I love the holidays – everything about them fills me with merriment and feelings of fa la la. I especially love baking, because the house smells so won…