Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

6 Salty Safety Tips For Your Dog On A Boat

Before you set sail, let''s go over some safety tips that will come in handy this summer. You want this trip for your dog on a boat to go ship-shape!

Let It Rain: Gold Paw Series Has Your Pup Covered

The warmth of fleece is paired with a waterproof back panel for the Portland Pullover. This hybrid pullover keeps your dog dry and looking sharp in the wette…

Kickstarter Book Exposes Truth – Puppies Are Dicks!

Get ready to have an ""accident!"" Hilarious book warns dog lovers to stay away from puppies, and adopt a senior dog instead.

Dogs Get Schooled In Earning Treats With Smart Feeder Pet Tutor Blu

The Bluetooth LE-enabled Pet Tutor Blu encourages good behavior, physical and mental activity through a customizable, reward-based training regimen.

Keeshond

The Keeshond is a simply wonderful companion for many types of people. He is a fun-loving, sweet fellow that makes a great addition to many households.

Koolie

The Koolie played a role in the development of the Australian Cattle Dog. An intelligent and hard-working breed that generally responds well to training.

Lykoi

The Lykoi cat breed is also known Werewolf cat - this is due to its werewolf-like appearance. It is the only cat that has a roan coat pattern.

Bullmastiff

These large dogs boast great endurance, strength, and a solid body. The Bullmastiff is protective and fearless when protecting its master and family.

Why Playtime Is So Important For Your Cat

Reasons why you need to schedule a play date with your cat every day A lot of people think that cats are independent and don’t really require a lot of…

Bambino

The Bambino is one of several dwarf feline breeds that are also known as miniature cats. They are known for being mischievous, outgoing, and rambunctious.

10 Best Belly Bands

We are bringing you our list of the 10 best belly bands on the market – they are specifically designed to contain urine in male dogs, and work as a unique form of dog diapers.

Fill Your Cat’s Stocking With Temptations Treats

Ho, ho, ho – holidays are here! As a loving pet parent, you’re probably already planning what presents to buy and what to stuff in your pet’s stocking – they’re a part of the family, too, so they deserve nothing less than to be a part of the holiday cheer and spirit of giving.

Global Pet Expo: West Paw’s New Collar and Leash Line Helps Prevent

One of our new faves at Global Pet Expo 2018 is West Paw''s new collar and leash collection--perfect for less lunges on your daily walks.

7 Safety Tips for Dogs Living in the Country

With all of those open spaces to explore, your dog couldn''t be happier with his country life. Ensure he gets the most out of it with these safety tips.

Dutch Rabbit

The Dutch rabbit is one of the oldest domestic rabbit breeds. This rabbit''s flyback fur is short, glossy and easy to maintain, and they love to play.