Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Adoptable Dog of the Week – Sammy

Our Adoptable Dog of the Week is Sammy, a little over 1.5 years old Australian Shepherd, Bull Mastiff, and Great Pyrenees mix from Olathe, Kansas.

Swedish Elkhound

The Swedish Elkhound is also known as the Jämthund and the Moosehound. It is an intelligent breed and one that is eager to please.

Foxhoodle

The energetic Foxhoodle brings together the outgoing English Foxhound and the playful Poodle. He loves to be front and center in all family activities.

Peacock Cichlids

Compared to other Lake Malawi cichlids, Peacock cichlids are relatively peaceful. They come in a wide variety of bright colors, often in iridescent shades.

Chorgi

From their distinct short-legged body and fluffy coat to their territoriality and independence, Chorgis are quite distinct in the world of hybrid dog breeds – and will need experienced owners.

Global Pet Expo: A Royal Bed Designed Especially for Your Furry Duches

Trying to see everything at the Global Pet Expo 2018 is ruff. And we''ve found the softest ever dog beds... don''t mind us while we catch a little nap!

Best Bowls For Your Pomsky

Dog food and water bowls come in different shapes and sizes (like your pooch), so be sure you have the right one for your Pomsky!

Poetic Dogs Photo Series Casts Pups As Literary Icons

Roses are red, violets are blue, the Poetic Dogs photo book is a must-have for you (man, we suck at poetry) Poetic Dogs is an awesome new photo series by Ita…

How To Groom A Dog

Here are the basics you''ll need to know on how to groom a dog. Feel free to print it out and keep it on the fridge for quick reference.

Red Factor Canary

The stunning Red Factor Canary is best known for its vivid scarlet red feathers, but there is much more to this pet bird than just its fabulous looks.

Springador

The Springador is a cross between a purebred English Springer Spaniel and Labrador Retriever. They are active, loyal, and loving dogs.

Best Puppy Treats

If you have recently brought a puppy into your home, it’s an exciting time! Especially if this is your first dog. One mistake that new pet owners make is to buy everything and anything that catches their attention, spending far more than needed to meet their new dog’s needs. This often results in piles of dog supplies sitting unused and going to waste. With treats specifically, you may purchase 5 different kinds only to find out later that 4 aren’t recommended for your dog due to the ingredients used, the brand’s recall history, or other factors.If you relate to this, don’t worry. We’ve got yo

Best Small Dog Beds

Small dog beds are specially designed to offer superior comfort and support to small breed dogs. Take a look at our selection of very best small dog beds!

German Wirehaired Pointer

Loving, easily trainable, independent, amiable, and responsive - all of these things describe the German Wirehaired Pointer. Read on to find out more.

Oldenburg Horse

The Oldenburg horse displays an air of nobility, and have evolved into a popular sport breed. This breed is known for having a pleasant personality,