Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Loggerhead Musk Turtle

The Loggerhead Musk Turtle is one of several Musk Turtle species. These small turtles make great pets, including for beginners.

5 Time Saving Tips For Choosing A Pet Insurance Policy

One of the reasons why pet parents forgo dog insurance is the work that goes into comparing policies. But what if there was a way to simplify the process?

AKC Announces The Most Popular Dogs In The U.S. For 2014

This breed may never have taken home the Best in Show title, but the Labrador Retriever is still #1 one with North Americans! Talk about a never-ending winni…

Russian Harlequin Hound

The Russian Harlequin Hound has excellent hunting skills and also makes a pleasant family pet. This scenthound as a friendly and good-natured breed.

Product Review: GoPro Fetch Dog Harness [Video]

What’s the perfect accessory for a dog on the go? A GoPro Fetch Dog Harness! That’s we gave it to Kevin Roberts, our resident over-active dog dad…

MEOW! Hot Model Loves His Adorable Cat

MEOW! Here''s even more proof that guys who love cats are hot! Canadian Model Travis DesLaurier adores his fluffy BFF, Jacob.

Dog Laws – Gracie’s Law Says Dogs More Than Property

When it comes to dog laws, not everyone in your house is treated equal. Your dog is a member of your family, not a piece of property.

Eastern Painted Turtle

The Eastern Painted Turtle is an attractive pet turtle breed that is ideal for beginners. They have a pleasant disposition, and are energetic and active.

Can Cats Eat Apples?

A crisp, sweet treat, chowing down on an apple is a nutritious way to satisfy your hunger. But can cats eat apples?

Top 10 Cool Finds From SuperZoo 2013 – Part 2

SuperZoo 2013 was a whirlwind of awesome pet products and amazing pet people. We saw so many cool things and we wish we had the time and space to write ab…

10 Pawsitively Magnificent Maltese Trinkets

Falling in love with these trinkets is easy when they''re adorned with an adorable Maltese. Which ones are on your must have list?

Jenday Conure

Whether it is dancing to music, singing along, playing with improvised toys or cuddling, the Jenday conure has no trouble with entertainment.

What To Expect When You Adopt A Dog

You''ve decided to adopt a dog! That''s wonderful news. And because you''re such an awesome expectant pet parent, you need to know just what you''re in for.

Quinoa Grain-Free Dog Treat Recipes

I love quinoa - it''s grain and gluten free and it''s high in protein. It really was a no-brainer to use it in my Quinoa Grain-Free Dog Treat Recipe.

Rex Rabbit

The Rex rabbit has short, soft fur that points out instead of against their bodies, making this breed super plushy. It is a generally docile rabbit.