Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Can Dogs Eat Strawberries?

Can dogs eat strawberries raw or cooked? Are there any benefits or risks? Strawberry dog treat recipes? Find out this and more in this all-in-one guide.

Ocicat

Neither a demanding or clingy cat, the Ocicat loves to be with his humans as much as possible and isn''t above nudging you for a bit of attention.

Why Food Matters So Much to Finicky Felines

Does your cat stick her nose in the air when you present her daily vitals? There''s a reason why so many people think that felines are finicky!

Honest Kitchen Goes Gluten-Free With Its Dehydrated Dog Food

Going gluten free and all natural has never been easier It seems like everyone is going gluten free these days. And it’s not just humans – dogs a…

Best Cat Tunnels

If you haven’t thought about giving your cat a tunnel to play in, or if you don’t think your kitty would benefit from one, it’s worth reconsidering. In fact, many experts recommend getting your feline friend at least one tunnel that she can use to hide, play, or relax and nap whenever she wants.

This Charming Tabby Relieves People’s Flying Stress With Snuggles

At Calgary International Airport, no one is stressed because of delayed flights or long lines. And it''s all thanks to a friendly tabby cat.

Pet-Themed Coloring Books for Adults

Do you like to think and color outside of the lines? Turn to adult coloring for stress relief and check out these five pet-themed coloring books for adults.

Mystery Solved! This Is Why Your Dog Kicks When You Scratch His Belly

Why do they do that? Science reveals the story behind all that crazy kicking. Ever wondered why your dog goes bananas when you scratch him in that one perfec…

Adoptable Dog Of The Week – Spankee

Meet Spankee, our Adoptable Dog of the Week. Spankee is an adult English Pointer and Dalmatian Mix from Newcastle, Oklahoma. He’s already neutered, hou…

Best Dog Anxiety Vests

Dog anxiety vests can relax your pet in triggering situations by relying on the soothing power of applied pressure. Read on to learn more!

Filefish

Filefish are a curious species of saltwater fish. They are characterized by their rhomboid shaped bodies, thick, sandpaper-like skin and small, fleshy fins.

6 Questions to Ask Before You Adopt a Dog With Your Partner

You''re thinking of taking a big step in your relationship - adopting a dog as a couple. Before you do, ask yourself these six important questions.

DoggoRamps Keeps Your Pet Safe From Back Injuries

As DoggoRamps is a fully adjustable dog ramp, it makes for a smooth ""climb"" to your bed, that won''t put any additional stress on your pet''s back.

Product Review: Burt’s Bees Multicare Dental Foam and Dental Spray

Misfit the Pitbull tests out two new dog dental care products for us February is Dog Dental Health Month, and to celebrate, we wanted to test out a new produ…

Alexandrine Parakeet

The Alexandrine Parakeet is a fun, playful, loving parrot that will make a fantastic companion to a responsible and a devoted owner.