Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Siren Dog Howls Along With Emergency Vehicles [Video]

There are some dogs that like to talk back to police, ambulance and fire truck sirens. But this Golden Retriever has them all beat. This has to be one of the…

Blue Throated Macaw

The Blue Throated Macaw is an intelligent and friendly bird with great personalities and, due to their long lifespan, make a perfect life-long companion.

Golden Shepherd

The devoted Golden Shepherd brings the gentle nature of the Golden Retriever and the loyalty of the German Shepherd Dog together for a great family pet.

Texas Heeler

An excellent watch and herding dog, the Texas Heeler is a hybrid breed resulting from the crossing an Australian Cattle Dog and Australian Shepherd Dog.

Best Retractable Leashes for Dogs of All Sizes

Take a look at our diverse list of retractable leashes for dogs of all sizes, with different features and styles- any pet pawrent can find what they need!

2018 Global Pet Expo Day 3: That’s A Wrap!

2018 Global Pet Expo has come to an end, but the things we''ve seen and learned here will keep us motivated and excited for years to come.

Dogs On The Inside: Inspiring Documentary About Rescue Dogs and Inmate

This touching movie follows a program that aims to save shelter dogs while giving inmates a new perspective on life. Life is not always easy for humans. In t…

Yorkie Ton

A rare and relatively recent designer dog breed, the Yorkie Ton is developed by crossing two purebred dogs- Yorkshire Terrier and Coton de Tulear.

Can Cats Eat Bananas?

Bananas are a popular healthy snack - but can cats eat bananas? Read on to find out if this fruit can be fed to your pet.

European Shorthair

Today, the sleek and stocky European Shorthair may be the most common feline in Europe, and it may also be the oldest feline breed in continental Europe.

Oriental

The Oriental is one of the most people-oriented of all cat breeds. They don''t just want to share their lives with you, they need to.

Coton De Tulear

Sweet-natured and sporting a cottony-soft coat, the Coton de Tulear is a delightful companion that will happily become your shadow.

Simple Homemade Beef Stew Recipe For Dogs

Your dog needs a break from dry kibble now and then - so boring! And that''s when this super simple homemade beef stew recipe for dogs comes in handy.

Small Münsterländer

Known as the Kleiner Mnsterlnder, the Small Mnsterlnder looks like a smaller version of the versatile hunting breed known as the Large Mnsterlnder.

Purple Crowned Lorikeet

Thanks to their small size and relatively quiet behavior, Purple Crowned Lorikeet is a great choice for an apartment pet.