Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

PetSafe ScoopFree Self-Cleaning Cat Litter Box

What if there was a product that took over the duty of picking up after your cat? Let the PetSafe ScoopFree Self-Cleaning Cat Litter Box do all the work for you.

Dogs Wearing Soccer Jerseys Score With World Cup Fans

PetGuide.com can’t wait for 2014 FIFA World Cup to start tomorrow. And when it kicks off in Brazil, we’ll all be watching with our pooches, sport…

Dog Travel Essentials: What to Pack for Your Dog

Make a list and check it twice – here’s what you’ll need to pack when you bring your dog along with you on your vacation!There is nothing more exciting than…

Crate Alternatives for Dogs Who Hate the Crate

If you have a dog, you probably have a crate. But what do you do when your dog hates the crate? Here are a few alternatives.

What is Pet Selection Counseling?

If you need guidance when adding a furry family member to your ranks, it may be a good idea to consider pet selection counseling.

Oscars

Oscars are one of the most popular species of freshwater fish in the aquarium hobby today. They are also a highly intelligent species of fish.

Cats on Laps Shelter Animals Bring Senior Citizens Special Love

An animal shelter in Bangor, Maine is using adoptable cats to bring lots of furry love to seniors who aren''t able to have pets of their own.

Tick SR Makes Dog Tick Removal Quick and Painless

If your dog as ever had ticks, you never forget that experience. But there''s a solution for quick and painless dog tick removal and it''s called Tick-SR.

French Bulldog

This stocky and adorable little fellow always looks like it''s in a good mood. A wonderful friend, the French Bulldog has a sweet and funny personality.

Close Encounters of the Bear Kind: Bringing Bear Bells on Dog Hikes

It''s bear season, which may put a damper on your fall dog hikes. Should you put bear bells on your dog''s collar, or are you ringing up the wrong tree?

Australian Kelpie

The Australian Kelpie is a highly intelligent breed of herding dog that likes to work hard. It is friendly and playful, always eager to please its owner.

Tips For Taking Your Cat On Vacation With You

Taking a trip with your kitty? Here are some tips to go over before you leave the house. If you’re planning a trip, you might be tempted to take your b…

Something Smells Fishy… It’s Tuna, In His First VW Ad! [Video]

Tuna melts your heart in this adorable Volkswagen commercial. Don’t you love when a social media site makes someone a bona fide star? Just look at Tuna…

What Emotions Do Dogs Actually Experience?

Naked feelings of love, fairness and jealousy of our loyal companions Any long-time dog lover will be able tell you that their dog has feelings. But is there…

Bathroom Break: How To Toilet Train Your Cat

Don’t let your dreams of a litter box-free home get flushed – here’s how to toilet train your cat! If you are absolutely tired of dealing w…