Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

5 Cool Ways To Keep Your Pet Safe This Summer

From grape poisoning to insect bites, here are some need-to-know tips to keep your four-legged best friend''s tail wagging this summer.

LaPerm

Elegant and athletic, the active LaPerm is also an excellent lap cat with an affectionate, gregarious, and inquisitive nature. They make superb family pets.

Top 10 Dog Workout Products for Workout Woofs

Your dog wants to be active, because it means more fun and more time with you! Check out these woofing workout products that''ll condition your canine.

Military Macaw

Military Macaw has well-rounded personality and this bird is the ideal choice if you are looking for a loveable, smart parrot to be your new best friend.

Adoptable Dog of the Week – Walnut

You''ll go nuts for Walnut, our Adoptable Dog of the Week. Walnut is a young male Pitbull mix from Sunnyvale, California.

Lake Tanganyika Cichlids

There are more than 250 species of Lake Tanganyika cichlids that have been identified, in a wide variety of colors and patterns.

Napoleon Cat

The Napoleon is also known as the Minuet Cat, and the breed''s name is a reference to Napoleon Bonaparte because of its short stature.

SuperZoo 2018: Petrics Smart Bed Ecosystem

Petrics'' new Smart Pet Bed, Activity Tracker and Health and Nutrition App is part of an ecosystem designed to help you take better care of your pets.

Upside Down Dog of the Week – Luke

Meet Luke, our Upside Down Dog of the Week from Upsidedowndogs.com. Luke is an 8.5-year-old male Pitbull and Boxer mix. Here’s what his owner Bailey sa…

Adoptable Dog of the Week- Sparky

Our Adoptable Dog of the Week is Sparky, a 4 years old Chihuahua mix from Wethersfield, Connecticut. He is neutered, vaccinated, and housebroken.

What’s Wrong With Feeding Your Cat Kibble?

Is kibble enough for your kitty? To ensure that your cat is getting all the nutrition she needs, be sure to put the right ingredients in her dinner bowl.

I Can’t Afford My Dog’s Vet Bill! What Do I Do?

You''re thankful that your dog was able to recover from a life-threatening illness... but the vet bill is huge. How are you going to fix this problem?

Hooray for Happy Endings! Meet Skier Gus Kenworthy’s Sochi Street Pu

7 months after the Olympic Winter Games, the puppies that American silver medal skier Gus Kenworthy rescued from the streets of Sochi are thriving. You might…

Upside Down Dog Of The Week – Betty

We know it’s only Tuesday – only four more days until the weekend. To make the beginning of the week more enjoyable, we present to you our Upside…

The Latest in Dog Travel Essentials From Global Pet Expo

At 2013 Global Pet Expo, we saw so many new and fashionable ways to travel with your pup. Here are just a few of the options we spotted.