Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

On The Road Again: Road Tripping With Your Dog

To say that Kevin Roberts has taken the road less traveled is an understatement. He’s a really outdoors kind of guy, and he brings his dogs along for t…

Tenterfield Terrier

The Tenterfield Terrier was developed in Australia and it is just as popular for its ability to hunt small prey as for its aptitude as a family companion.

Scottish Fold

The Scottish Fold is a hardy cat, doing justice to the breed''s working class origins. They have very small, soft voices and in general ""speak"" only rarely.

What Does a Cat’s Arched Back Mean?

We''re not talking about the popular yoga position. What does a cat''s arched back mean?

How a Simple Hobby Turned Into a Knotty Pet Toy Business

Chuck Hoover brought some rope home so he could practice his new hobby of knot making, it turned out his dog Hampton loved them and a business was born.

DIY Flower Pot to Dog Water Bowl

This raised dog water bowl is budget-friendly and simple to make- in less than 5 minutes, you''ll have a fab garden ornament that doubles as a pet bowl!

Hanover Hound

Also known as the Hanoverian Hound, the Hanover Hound is a hunting and tracking breed descended from medieval bloodhounds.

Shocking Stats Reveal The True Cost Of Greyhound Racing

Grey2K USA and the ASPCA study shows 12,000 dogs injured at the racetracks over seven-year period. Greyhound racing has proven itself to be a cruel sport tha…

Planet Dog Adds A New Crop Of Carrots To Its Line Of Produce Dog Toys

Remember when your mom told you to stop playing with your veggies? That doesn''t apply to Planet Dog''s new Carrot from the Orbee-Tuff Produce dog toy line.

American Leopard Hound

The American Leopard Hound is an old breed of dog originating from Northern America. It''s used as a tree dog and an all-purpose hunting dog in America.

Top 10 Self-Cleaning Kitty Litter Boxes

Want to make poop scooping business as hands-free as possible? Check out our list of top 10 self-cleaning kitty litter boxes to find a type that will suit you and your feline friend.

6 Questions to Ask Before You Adopt a Dog With Your Partner

You''re thinking of taking a big step in your relationship - adopting a dog as a couple. Before you do, ask yourself these six important questions.

How You Can Protect Pets From Emergencies At Home

How can we make sure our pets are protected if there is an emergency in our home? Read on to find out how to protect pets from emergencies at home. I love my…

Therapy Dogs May Be The Key To Less Stress And Loneliness At Colleges

Feeling stressed or depressed? Spending time with a furry friend may be just the thing you need. We all know it to be intuitively true: when we spend time wi…

Top 10 Things To Do On Your Dog’s Summer Bucket List

After a long Canadian winter, my dogs and I are so ready for the dog days of summer! To make the most of our summer time fun, I have devised my ultimate summertime bucket list.