Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Boulonnais Horse

Considered the most elegant of all of the equine draft breeds, the Boulonnais Horse is also referred to as the White Marble Horse.

Plott

The Plott is a brave and courageous hunter as well as a loyal family companion. He is a high-energy dog and needs an active family to keep him happy.

Best Backpacks for Dogs

For hiking, biking, or simply to help a tired pooch, backpack carriers can be a perfect solution. Read on to find out which bacpacks for dogs are the best!

Fabulous Felines: Here Are 5 Most Expensive Cat Breeds In The World

From exotic hybrids to classic and noble felines, here are the most expensive cat breeds in the world – you might be surprised which of them made the top five list.

Cock A Tzu

The sweet-natured Cock A Tzu is a fun-loving combination of the outgoing Cocker Spaniel and the playful yet stubborn little Shih Tzu.

Adoptable Dog Of The Week – Bentley

Meet Bentley, our Adoptable Dog of the Week from Adoptapet.com. He’s a young Yorkshire Terrier who lives in Madison Heights, MI. He is already neutered…

New Canine Cancer Research Findings Could Benefit People, Too

Veterinarians at Mississippi State University are searching for new ways to understand cancer in dogs — turns out, their findings may help us as well.…

Florida Softshell Turtle

The Florida Softshell Turtle is best suited to experienced turtle owners. It is the biggest of all of the North American Softshell Turtles.

Tigerfish

The Tigerfish is a type of freshwater fish belonging to the genus Datnioides (Datnoids). It''s named for the vertical stripes that run all along its body.

What Are the Benefits of Kelp for Dogs?

Considered to be a ""superfood,"" kelp is packed with vitamins, minerals and amino acids. It''s not just for humans - here are the benefits of kelp for dogs.

Russian Doodle Terrier

The family friendly Russian Doodle Terrier is the offspring of the intelligent Standard Poodle and the protective Black Russian Terrier.

DIY Cat Scratch Pad

Instead of wasting money on toys your cat is supposed to destroy, make your own DIY cat scratching pad with recycled materials. It''s green, cheap, and fun!

All Aboard! Law Allowing Dogs On Amtrak Trains Is On Track

Congressman Jeff Denham gaining traction with bill that allows small pets on Amtrak trains. I always feel guilty leaving my dog behind when I go on adventure…

Fo Tzu

Fo Tzu is a recent designer dog breed and it is developed by crossing a Toy Fox Terrier to a Shih Tzu. Read to find out moe about these playful dogs!

Malamoodle

The Malamoodle combines the intelligent poodle and the pack-oriented nature of the Alaskan Malamute. The Malamoodle is a friendly, loving family dog.