Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Fashion Icon Karl Lagerfeld Leaves Beloved Cat A Hefty Inheritance

While the fashion world mourns the passing of icon designer Karl Lagerfeld, friends wondered what would come of his beloved cat Choupette. No need to worry,…

PetHub Turns Smartphones Into A Valuable Tracking Tool

Just scan the QR code on PetHub’s tag to identify a lost dog Most dogs aren’t equipped with a microchip, but most humans are equipped with a smar…

Something Smells Fishy… It’s Tuna, In His First VW Ad! [Video]

Tuna melts your heart in this adorable Volkswagen commercial. Don’t you love when a social media site makes someone a bona fide star? Just look at Tuna…

Dos And Don’ts For Boarding Your Dog [Video]

Before you board your dog, make sure you’ve done your homework – and we’ve made it easy for you with this list of helpful dos and don&rsquo…

English Foxhound

Originally bred as a hunting dog, the English Foxhound is an iconic symbol of the British Hunt. It is a strongly built breed and has muscular legs.

A Short Guide To Common Parasites In Cats

Both external and internal parasites can affect a cat of any age, and can cause issues. Here''s our list of just a few of the many common parasites in cats.

Treeing Walker Coonhound

Also known as the English Coonhound, the Treeing Walker Coonhound is passionate about hunting. On top of that, this dog also makes an excellent family pet.

Study: Dog’s Inner Poop Compass Lines Up With Earth’s Axis

I’m going to think twice the next time I get annoyed at Oscar taking his time to find the perfect pooping spot. It turns out his compulsion to turn in…

Does My Dog Need Winter Boots?

Yes, those cute little booties are more than a fashion statement – if you’ve been questioning their efficacy, read on to find out if your pet could use a pair of nice winter boots to keep their paws snug and warm.

Facts And Myths About Dog Insurance Policies

What’s true and what’s false? Let’s clear up some common dog insurance policy questions. Everyone seems to have something to say on the top…

Best Flea Spray for Dogs

Flea spray for dogs will help you keep your pet parasite-free without much hassle - they work immediately and are easy to apply.

Ask The Hairy Dogfathers: Therapy Dog Fraud?

Just because you can register your pooch as a therapy dog, does it mean that you should? A few thoughts on if a dog should be registered for convenience.

African Grey Congo

The African Grey Congo is loved worldwide as an intelligent, inquisitive, and entertaining pet that also makes a lifelong companion.

5 Essential Dog-Friendly Thanksgiving Travel Tips

We''ve got the recipe for safe and stress-free travel with your dog this Thanksgiving. You need to plan in advance - you''ll be thankful that you did!

Cavapom

A mix of Pomeranian and Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, the cute and affectionate Cavapom is makes a wonderful family pet or a companion for singles.