Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Cat-astrophe: Common Bad Behavior Issues And How To Fix Them

Bad kitty! Unwanted habits can be tough to break, but here are a few ways you can correct your cat’s naughty ways. Even though every feline is unique,…

Can Dogs Eat Strawberries?

Can dogs eat strawberries raw or cooked? Are there any benefits or risks? Strawberry dog treat recipes? Find out this and more in this all-in-one guide.

Affenpoo

The Affenpoo is a cross between a purebred Affenpinscher and Poodle. They are social dogs that do not like being alone for long periods of time.

Labrottie

The Labrottie is a cross between a purebred Labrador Retriever and Rottweiler. These dogs are known for their affectionate and devoted personality.

Doxie Chon

The Doxie Chon is an intelligent and lively designer dog, developed by crossing the fluffy Bichon Frise and the short-legged Dachshund.

Gift Guide: Must-Have Essentials For The Holidays

It''s that time of year, and you know your best pal is at the top of the good list. The holidays are bustling, and we want to make sure you have all the holiday must-haves.

Hulstlander Rabbit

The Hulstlander Rabbit features a medium length coat that''s lustrous and dense. This rabbit''s fur will be white, and his eyes will be blue.

SuperZoo 2018: Soggy Doggy No-Pockets Leash Keeps Your Phone Dry

The Soggy Doggy No-Pockets Leash securely holds your phone in a waterproof case when it''s time to take your dog for a walk.

Winter Training Tips: Getting Started In Skijoring

Skijoring is a team sport. You and your dog work together to get around a trail, tour the back country or glide across the snow on your local golf course.

Top 10 Self-Cleaning Kitty Litter Boxes

Want to make poop scooping business as hands-free as possible? Check out our list of top 10 self-cleaning kitty litter boxes to find a type that will suit you and your feline friend.

The Shocking Truth About Dogs and Garlic

There is a lot of controversy surrounding dogs and garlic on the Internet. Thanks to the research efforts of experts, many believe garlic is good for dogs.

Irish Wolfoodle

A gentle giant that loves kids, the Irish Wolfoodle brings the friendly nature of the Irish Wolfhound together with the playful Standard Poodle.

On-Leash Dog Greetings: Yea or Nay?

Letting your pup greet other dogs while on leash isn''t always fun and games. Keep these tips in mind the next time you''re on a walk.

Lucy Liu Launches Le Roar, Dedicated To Quality Pet Products

Actress Lucy Liu partners with costume designer Ellen Stockbridge for her first dog product line, offering chic home and play accessories made in the U.S.

Cava Tzu

The super-friendly little Cava Tzu brings together the sweet-natured Cavalier King Charles Spaniel and the headstrong little Shih Tzu.