Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Giant Mutant Spider Dog Terrifies Victims in Hilarious Prank [Video]

Watch out for things that go bump in the night… we hear there’s a giant mutant spider dog on the loose! Residents of a town in Poland got the fr…

Hanover Hound

Also known as the Hanoverian Hound, the Hanover Hound is a hunting and tracking breed descended from medieval bloodhounds.

Jealous Great Dane Doesn’t Want To Share The Love [Video]

Science has recently proven that dogs get jealous, too (tell us pet parents something we don’t already know!). This Great Dane hilariously shares his d…

Can Dogs Be Racist?

Dogs love everyone... or do they? Is it possible for dogs to be racist? Let''s look at a few reasons why you might think your dog a bias toward certain people.

Lhasalier

The Lhasalier is a mix between Cavalier King Charles Spanial and the Lhasa Apso. This designer dog is an ideal family pet.

Basque Shepherd Dog

If you are looking for a family-friendly breed that is unlike any other dog you''ve ever seen, consider the Basque Shepherd Dog.

Chartreux

An amiable and loyal breed, the Chartreux is known to follow its human from room to room chirping quietly and actively interested in whatever is going on.

Mexican Red Headed Amazon

Although endangered in the wild, the Mexican Red Headed Amazon parrot is relatively common as pets and are loved for their funny personality.

Best Heated Beds for Dogs

Whether it''s cold weather or senior years, a warm bed comes in handy. These are top 15 best heated beds for dogs that will keep any fur baby warm and comfy!

It’s Natural That Your Dog Wants Jones Natural Chews

Have you got a bone to pick... with dog bones? If you''re thinking of giving your dog one to chew on, remember that not all meat bones are created equal.

HABRI Proves Animals Provide Amazing Health Benefits

Human Animal Bond Research Initiative survey shows that 97% of doctors believe owning a pet benefits health Whenever I come home after a bad day, my dog is m…

It’s All Greek Yogurt To Me Dog Treat Recipe

One of my favorite snacks is Greek yogurt. Smooth, creamy and rich, Greek yogurt is a taste of the Mediterranean you can enjoy in the middle of the day.

After 11 Long Years, a Cat That Was Presumed Dead Returns Home

If a pet story can be considered a real life miracle, it’s the one about Toby, a family cat that - it would seem - lived a life of great adventure.

DIY No-Sew Pet Bed

Budget-friendly and easy to make, this DIY dog bed won''t cost you more than $15 and you can make it under and hour. Plus, your pet will absolutely love it!

Pitsky

The Pitsky is a handsome, muscular cross between an American Pitbull Terrier and a Siberian or Alaskan Husky. They do best in high energy households.