Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Is Your Pooch A Pessimist? Scientists Say The Answer May Be ‘Yes’

This is probably the closest you’ll get to an answer from your dog when you ask “How are you feeling?” Most of us think of dogs the way we…

Adoptable Dog of the Week- Bogey

Our Adoptable Dog of the Week is Bogey, an adorable 6 years old Lhasa Apso and Bichon Frise Mix from Fargo, North Dakota.

Fill Your Cat’s Stocking With Temptations Treats

Ho, ho, ho – holidays are here! As a loving pet parent, you’re probably already planning what presents to buy and what to stuff in your pet’s stocking – they’re a part of the family, too, so they deserve nothing less than to be a part of the holiday cheer and spirit of giving.

Florida Softshell Turtle

The Florida Softshell Turtle is best suited to experienced turtle owners. It is the biggest of all of the North American Softshell Turtles.

Basic Dog Tricks: Shake A Paw

The shake a paw trick is a basic trick that should be one of your dog''s standards that he can pull out when guests come over and he wants to impress them.

Adoptable Dog of the Week – Dukes

Meet Dukes, our Adoptable Dog of the Week from Adoptadog.com. This senior from Mays Landing, NJ still has lots of life in him and wants to find a home to cal…

5 Ways Probiotics Can Help Your Dog

You take probiotics to help your digestion - but did you know that your pooch could take them, too? Here are a few reasons to give your dog probiotics.

Morkie

Tiny and adorable, the Morkie is an affectionate crossbreed who loves people and pets. He attaches to his family, which can be a problem when left alone.

Upside Down Dog Of The Week – Willie

It’s Tuesday, and you know what that means – it’s time to announce our Upside Down Dog of the Week from Upsidedowndogs.com. This week&rsquo…

Thoroughbred Horse

The Thoroughbred Horse has a bold and spirited personality that isn''t suitable for riders and owners who do not have experience.

Adoptable Dog Of The Week – Normandy

Say hello to Normandy, our Adoptable Dog of the Week from Adoptapet.com. Normandy is a young male Labrador Retriever and Shar Pei mix from San Diego, CA. He…

Just As Gross As Is Sounds: The Low-Down On Roundworms In Dogs

We''ve got the poop-scoop on roundworms in dogs - and it ain''t a pretty sight! Found in animal feces, it can be passed along from dog to human.

Black & Decker Now Offers a New Line of Smart Pet Products

Black & Decker is known for its extensive line of home improvement products. And by partnering with Wagz, Inc., the brand dips its paw into the pet market.

Vote For Your Shelter During PAL’s Shelter Showdown

Second Annual Shelter Showdown hosted by Pets Add Life to award $50,000 to animal shelters From October 22 to November 19, 2014, Pets Add Life (PAL) will be…

Norbottenspets

The Norbottenspets is a spitz-type dog that is considered a rare breed. It is often ranked among the top dog breeds for getting along with children.