Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Readers’ Picks: The Best Pet Products on Amazon, According to You

We went through your shopping carts to come up with this list of the best pet products purchased by our readers on Amazon in 2017.

Small Münsterländer

Known as the Kleiner Mnsterlnder, the Small Mnsterlnder looks like a smaller version of the versatile hunting breed known as the Large Mnsterlnder.

Pyrenean Mastiff

A fluffy dog with a calm and even temperament, the Pyrenean Mastiff is a super-sized softie. This dog originated in the Aragonese Pyrenees region of Spain.

Ready to Foster Cats? Here’s Some Advice From a Pro

If you''re ready to take the plunge and become a foster kitty mom, these amazing tips from a seasoned pro will help you out.

Ray Fish

Rays are a large group of fish closely related to sharks. Ray fish are characterized by their flat bodies and a tough, elastic skeleton made of cartilage.

Engatzu Spaniel

Engatzu Spaniel is a hybrid breed, with two purebred parents: English Toy Spaniel and Shih Tzu. Read on to find out more about these rare designer dogs!

Enter Your Biker Dog In The Tails & Tailpipes Biketoberfest Phot

Does your dog like to ride on a hog? If so, your motorcycle-lovin’ pooch could win you a three-night stay in Daytona Beach. Biketoberfest® Daytona…

Weimapeake

The Weimapeake is a cross between a purebred Chesapeake Bay Retriever and Weimaraner. They make fantastic family pets and prefer being around people.

How To House Train An Older Dog

Just because your dog''s not puppy, it doesn''t mean that indoor accidents won''t happen. We''ve put together some tips on how to house train an older dog.

What Is Dog Bite Liability Insurance?

If your dog bites someone, it can bite into your finances - is Dog Bite Liability Insurance necessary for you? Find out to protect yourself and your dog.

5 Ridiculous Myths About Rescue Dogs

You''ve heard the myths surrounding rescue dogs, and they may have prevented you from adopting one. We''re here to clear up some of the popular misconceptions

How to Keep Your Pets Safe While Moving

It''s time to move to a new house. While you''re packing and picking up boxes, how do you ensure that your pet is kept safe?

“Giving Shelter” Art Exhibit Combines Creativity and Condos for Ho

Architects for Animals displayed its acclaimed ''Giving Shelter'' exhibit recently, displaying unique outdoor dwellings for homeless cats.

Crimson Rosella

Crimson Rosella is sweet, playful, and very inquisitive parrot that does well as a pet in families of all shapes and sizes.

Savannah

The Savannah cat makes excellent companions and are surprisingly receptive and convivial with other pets in the house. These cats are serious jumpers!