Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Can Dogs Eat Strawberries?

Can dogs eat strawberries raw or cooked? Are there any benefits or risks? Strawberry dog treat recipes? Find out this and more in this all-in-one guide.

Umbrella Cockatoo

The Umbrella Cockatoo has been cherished for centuries. They are loving and affectionate birds, with many unique features.

Best Dog Crate Pans

Dog crate pans make sure your dog''s cozy nook remains clean and tidy- and make your job of keeping everything spotless so much easier.

Product Review: Madra Mor Mud Treatment

Because it’s Pampered Pooch month on PetGuide.com, I can’t think of a better time to try out Madra Mor Mud Treatment When I heard about the Madra…

Cornish Rex

The Cornish Rex is very much a people cat. They may look elegant, even aloof and dignified, but in reality they are active and affectionate.

Bright Idea Chuckit LIGHTPLAY Contest

Hey, here’s a bright idea – you should enter this contest to win cool glow-in-the-dark toys! You saw all the wonderful things Kevin Roberts had t…

Froodle

A mix between a Poodle and a French Bulldog, Froodle crossbreed combines the best traits of its parents into one, new designer dog.

Our Guide to the Best Cat Harnesses

Do you want to take your feline on some outdoor adventures? Then you’ll need a leash and harness designed for cats.

Best Dog Ball Launchers and Throwers for a Perfect Game of Fetch

Dog ball launchers make sure your pet has all the fun in the world and plenty of exercise- without you having to strain your arms to ensure it.

The Loving Bowl Puts A New Slant On The Way Dogs Eat

Flat-faced dogs rejoice – there’s now a bowl made just for you! A simple modification on a traditional design, The Loving Bowl serves up a new ta…

New Zealand Rabbit

The New Zealand Rabbit is large, muscular animals that has a beautiful coat. They are calm, and generally good with children and other pets.

10 Best Collars For Your Miniature Husky

Miniature huskies are a smaller version of the Siberian Husky -- here are some strong and sturdy collars that come in fun sizes we found just for them.

How Often Should You Groom Your Dog?

Rub-a-dub – how clean is too clean? Let’s answer that question for you right now. While it’s a fairly straightforward question, how often y…

Irish Water Spaniel

The Irish Water Spaniel is fun-loving and mischievous. He is a formidable hunter, pointer, swimmer and retriever as well as an awesome family companion.

How Can I Remove Plaque From My Dog's Teeth?

The best way to prevent plaque on a dog''s teeth is to brush them, but what about existing buildup? How can you remove plaque from your dog’s teeth at home – or is it something that has to be done professionally? Here’s what you need to know about plaque and tartar and how best to remove them.