Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

New Guinea Singing Dog

Named for its unique form of vocalization, the New Guinea Singing Dog is able to vary the pitch of their howl in combination with various yips and whines.

What to Do If Your Dog is Poisoned

Dog can get into trouble at any age - and that includes eating something they shouldn''t. Here''s what to do if your pet is poisoned.

Decoding the Mysterious Habits of Cats

What''s going through your cat''s head when she does crazy kitty stuff? Let''s take a closer look at the weird things your cat does and why she does it.

Grunts

Grunts are a family of saltwater fish made up of 150 different sub-species, some of which have been successfully introduced to the aquarium hobby.

Best Holiday Gifts for Pet Lovers

This year, our pet editors put together a list for Santa. If you''re looking for something to get us, please surprise us with one of these, please!

Vote For Your Shelter During PAL’s Shelter Showdown

Second Annual Shelter Showdown hosted by Pets Add Life to award $50,000 to animal shelters From October 22 to November 19, 2014, Pets Add Life (PAL) will be…

Boo! Baby Beef Dog Treat Recipe

I love Halloween! The costumes, the candy, the haunted houses, the candy, the Halloween parties, the candy. I don’t know about you, but I dress Oscar u…

What Are The Benefits Of Coconut Oil For Dogs?

What are the benefits of coconut oil for dogs? Not only does it help with digestion, it also works on joints, skin, coat and works as an antibacterial.

DOT Report Outlines 2014 Pet Injury And Fatality Numbers On Airlines

Planes, trains or automobiles… never has family travel been easier, right? Not so fast! Official numbers from 2014 regarding air travel with pets may…

Cat Owners Who Feed Their Pets Vegan Diet Could Face Fines or Jail Tim

While there might be good intentions behind a vegan dietary switch, imposing a meat-free diet on a cat is an act of animal cruelty, the UK charity warns.

Vasa Parrot

Meet the Vasa Parrot, one of the most unusual pet parrots you''ll ever see. From all black plummage to exceptional intelligence, this breed is truly unique.

Shiffon

The Shiffon is a cross between a purebred Shih Tzu and Brussels Griffon. They have a rambunctious, curious, playful, and cheerful personality.

Mudi

A medium-sized dog bred for herding, the Mudi is an exceptional and intelligent companion. This dog is a rare breed, as less than a few thousand exist today

White Bellied Caique

There''s no doubt about it - the White Bellied Caique will bring tons of fun and laughter to your life, and make a perfect family pet.

What You Should Know About Adopting A Special Needs Dog

Adopting a special needs dog can be one of the most rewarding experiences you ever have Since there are many dogs available for adoption, it’s often th…