Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

White Bellied Caique

There''s no doubt about it - the White Bellied Caique will bring tons of fun and laughter to your life, and make a perfect family pet.

Pups Will Dig the Underground DogDen 60 Dog House

Does your dog like to dig holes in the yard? You only have to dig one - for Miller Pet Products'' DogDen 60, an environmentally friendly outdoor dog den.

Top 10 Weird Pet Products You Never Knew You Needed

Being in the pet industry, we get to see a lot of strange things... we mean really odd. But being odd makes them that much more awesome.

Bernese Mountain Dog

When you think of a dog with a classic, tri-colored coat appearance, there''s a good chance you''ve met a the Bernese Mountain Dog.

German Pinscher

The German Pinscher comes from a long line of German breeds and it was used in the development of the Doberman Pinscher and the Rottweiler.

Orange Carob Dog Treat Recipe

It''s beginning to taste a lot like Christmas! It has something to do with our Orange Carob Dog Treat Recipe, a sweet treat with carob chips and clementines.

Morab Horse

The Morab horse features characteristics of the Morgan and Arabian breeds. It is elegant and compact, with strong muscles for power.

10 Sweet Stocking Stuffers for Your Dog

Your dog should have a stocking hanging over the fireplace mantle. Stuff it with these awesome holiday gifts that will put your pup in the festive spirit.

Flat-Coated Retriever

A wonderful family companion, the Flat-Coated Retriever (known as Flatties) is cheerful, optimistic and good-humored - a true Retriever in every sense.

Upside Down Dog Of The Week – Charlie

Meet Charlie, our Upside Down Dog of the Week from Upsidedowndogs.com. Charlie is a 6-month-old male Labrador Retriever and Pitbull mix from Houston, TX. Her…

How to Brush Dog Teeth

We''re going to introduce you to how to brush dog teeth. If you stop to think about it, brushing your dog''s teeth makes sense.

Top 10 Dog Toys For Aggressive Chewers

Tired of hearing that toys are indestructible and your heavy chewer won’t destroy them in 2.5 seconds, only to find out that they most certainly did? W…

Vizsla

Gentle, sensitive, and affectionate, Vizslas are a wonderful breed for a family. Silky and muscular, the average-sized Vizsla is a rare breed.

DentaDish Dog Bowl Stops Bloat and Brushes Teeth

Some dogs won''t let you near their teeth with a brush - what''s a pet parent to do? The new DentaDish may help keep your dog''s clean and healthy.

American English Coonhound

A true Southern U.S. dog, the American English Coonhound loves to hunt. Loud-voiced and hard-working, this dog is one of six official Coonhound breeds.