Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

DynaTrap Keeps Mosquitoes and Other Pesky Pests Away From Your Furbaby

This nifty device traps pesky insects, including mosquitoes, who can do a world of harm to your pet, such as infecting them with heartworm.

Ask the Animal Communicator: Concerns About Pets in Costume

Pet clothing, including holiday costumes and everyday wear, is quite in vogue these days. And it can be a lot of fun to dress up your pet. But is it as fun for your dog as it is for you?

I Can’t Afford My Dog’s Vet Bill! What Do I Do?

You''re thankful that your dog was able to recover from a life-threatening illness... but the vet bill is huge. How are you going to fix this problem?

Boxfish

Known as trunkfish, cowfish and cofferfish; boxfish are a family of bony marine fish. They are known for their square shaped body and heavy armored scales.

Majorca Shepherd Dog

The Majorca Shepherd Dog is a Spanish breed developed for shepherding cattle and is often used as an all-purpose farm dog.

Top Proteins - Which Protein is Best for Your Dog

Most pet parents are well aware that the dog food they buy needs to be protein-rich to satisfy their dog’s basic dietary needs.

Best Cat Strollers

Feel like taking your cat out for a walk, but a leash is out of the question? We''ve got the solution -- check out our choices for the best cat strollers.

Best Dog Poop Bag Holder

To help you find the perfect match from the get-go, whether you prefer minimalistic design or multi-purpose designs with built-in hand sanitizers or flashlights, we’ve rounded up the 10 best dog poop bag holders on the market.

Brittany

Favored by hunters as a popular breed at field trails, the Brittany is quick, curious, independent, and easy to train. Great pets for families and retirees.

Dottyback

Dottyback are a family of small saltwater fish made up of over 100 distinct species. They are hardy, intelligent and vibrantly colored, making them popular

Best Dog Heating Pads

Dog heating pads keep your pet cozy and warm, as well as relieve pain and discomfort for seniors. Make sure you get one on time!

Touch of Coconut Dog Treat Recipe

We''ve talked about the benefits of coconut oil and wanted to add it to a treat recipe. Viola - the Touch of Coconut Dog Treat Recipe.

Dandie Dinmont Terrier

The Dandie Dinmont Terrier is a distinctive breed, thanks to the poof ball on the top of his head. The Dandie is ideal for both urban and country living.

Beagle

The Beagle''s unique identity is thanks to its easy-going and easy-to-get-along-with nature.For many people, a Beagle is a perfect addition to the home.

One-Of-A-Kind Stuffed Shelter Pups Help Real-Life Rescue Dogs In Need

Made from wool in the US, these Shelter Pups do more than just look cute. Every purchase, earns donation points that go to an animal shelter of your choice.