Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Top 10 Long Haired Cat Breeds

These cats never have a bad hair day! Boasting downy soft and luxuriant locks, these long haired cat breeds are bushy balls of kitty goodness.

Belgian Laekenois

Bred to herd and protect, the Belgian Laekenois still has these instincts. This dog is not a suitable choice for families with young children or other pets.

Cat Owners Who Feed Their Pets Vegan Diet Could Face Fines or Jail Tim

While there might be good intentions behind a vegan dietary switch, imposing a meat-free diet on a cat is an act of animal cruelty, the UK charity warns.

Fighting Like Cats And Dogs: Dealing With A Cat-Aggressive Dog

Why can''t they just get along? What to do when your dog doesn’t see eye-to-eye with catsIf you have a multi-pet household, there may be times when your pets…

Grain-Free Almond Delight Dog Treat Recipe

Next up in my adventures in grain-free baking is almond flour. After baking with almond flour, my house smelled amazing! But it’s not just the smell th…

Best Agility Training Products

Read on to see our selection of the 10 best agility training products for all levels of fitness and skills!

Best Pet Vacuums for Dog and Cat Hair

f you invest in a pet vacuum that''s designed to suck up pet hair like it''s nobody''s business, you won''t have to live like Yeti is your roommate.

All About Spaying Dogs

So you might have heard about spaying, but be wondering what all the fuss is about. Spaying can be a controversial issue. Some people swear by it.

Best Calming Toys

Here is our list of the 10 best calming toys on the market – keep your eyes glued to this page and find the one that your anxious little pet will just fall in love with.

How to Dog-Proof Your Outdoor Barbecue

It’s barbecue season and your dog couldn’t be happier. Here’s how to ensure your BBQ is a success and keep your dog out of trouble Now that…

Shar Tzu

The easy-going Shar Tzu brings together the quiet, willful Chinese Shar-Pei and the fun, spunky Shih Tzu for a great companion dog.

Purina Issues Limited Recall on Purina ONE BeyOnd White Meat Chicken &

Purina has issued a limited recall on Purina ONE beyOnd Our White Meat Chicken & Whole Barley Recipe Adult Dry Dog Food due to a salmonella risk. This recall…

Rose Breasted Cockatoo

The Rose Breasted Cockatoo is most commonly known as the Galah, and it''s one of the most unusual and popular parrots in the diverse cockatoo family.

Gen Y Dogma: 5 Eye-Opening Lessons Learned During Our Crash Course In

Your puppy comes home, you’ve explored every inch of her adorable body, rubbing her belly and ears, taking pictures and posting them on Facebook for ev…

American Bullnese

The American Bullnese is a mix of breeds, predominately the English Bulldog and the Pekingese. They are short, stocky little clowns who love snuggling.