Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Devonshire Rex

The Devonshire Rex is one of the most fun-loving of all cats. Loyal and devoted to its humans, you are owned by the Devon, not the other way around.

White Fronted Amazon

With a relatively affordable price and an impressive intelligence, the White fronted Amazon could be a perfect choice for a new pet parrot.

What is Syringomyelia in Dogs?

An inherited disorder, syringomyelia in dogs affects the skull. A disease seen in smaller-breed dogs, here''s what you need to be on the lookout for.

Upside Down Dog of the Week – Luke

Meet Luke, our Upside Down Dog of the Week from Upsidedowndogs.com. Luke is an 8.5-year-old male Pitbull and Boxer mix. Here’s what his owner Bailey sa…

Why You Should Start Puppy Crate Training Now

Puppy crate training can be the best thing for your new furry addition to the family. Over time, the crate will become your puppy''s own private den.

Why the Litter-Robot III Is the Last Litter Box You’ll Need

It''s time to introduce your cat to the next generation of kitty litter - meet the Litter-Robot III! It''s a robotic cat litter box that cleans itself.

How To Stop A Puppy From Biting

Puppies love to bite. Those tiny, razor-sharp teeth are a part of a pup''s bite inhibition. Here are a few tips for how to stop a puppy from biting.

The Most Cat-ified Cat Video You’ve EVER Seen [Video]

What happens when you take a cat video, fill it up with cat graphics... and then throw more cats into the mix? You get cattiest cat video we have ever seen!

Gen Y Dogma: 5 Reasons My Dog Is A Dick!

As cute as they are, puppies also have a dark side – and Christina has discovered that the force runs strong in her puppy, Matilda Okay, so you might b…

3 Common Cat Training Mistakes

When it comes to training cats, you might not be sure where to begin. They aren’t like dogs, and they can be quite stubborn.

Blue Headed Parrot

If you''re living in an apartment and have always been worried about noise levels, the calm and quiet Blue Headed Parrot might be a good choice for you.

Danish Swedish Farmdog

If you were to see a Danish Swedish Farmdog, you might think that it was a Jack Russell Terrier - the two breeds are similar in terms of appearance.

Ocicat

Neither a demanding or clingy cat, the Ocicat loves to be with his humans as much as possible and isn''t above nudging you for a bit of attention.

Fjord Horse

The Fjord horse is friendly, gentle, and willing to work. Its mane is distinctive as it features dark hair in the center and white outer hair.

Top 10 Super Fly Pet Products From Skymall

Have you heard the news that Skymall, the in-flight catalog that offered a vast array of wacky, never-been-seen items for purchase, is seeking bankruptcy…