Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Tugging on Walks and Heartstrings

A shoulder injury caused by a pack of pulling dogs has one reader feeling guilty about one-on-one walks. The Hairy Dogfathers know how to handle this issue.

Scorpionfish

Scorpionfish are a family of marine fish comprised of over a 100 different species. They are counted among some of the most poisonous animals in the world.

Best Handy-Dandy Havanese Treasures

How do you show off your Havanese pride? We''d like to offer a few suggestions on the perfect pieces for Havanese lovers--just like you!

York Chocolate

York Chocolate cats are even-tempered, friendly, intelligent, curious, and energetic. They get along great with other pets and with children of all ages.

Fill Your Cat’s Stocking With Temptations Treats

Ho, ho, ho – holidays are here! As a loving pet parent, you’re probably already planning what presents to buy and what to stuff in your pet’s stocking – they’re a part of the family, too, so they deserve nothing less than to be a part of the holiday cheer and spirit of giving.

How One Dog Gets His Owners To Let Him Inside [Video]

Most dogs, when they want inside the house, bark until someone opens the door. Not this French Bulldog. We wouldn’t call it barking… well, we ju…

How To Prevent And Prepare For Fire Safety In Your Pet-Friendly Home

July 15 is National Pet Fire Safety Day - do you have a fire plan? Here''s what you can do to ensure that your pet and home are safe from flames and smoke.

Swedish Vallhund

The Swedish Vallhund is energetic and eager to make friends. This breed comes with 3 different types of tail: bobtail, a stub tail or a full curl tail.

Large Indian Parakeet

With its interesting and unique personality traits, the Large Indian Parakeet has won over the hearts of many owners around the world.

Top 10 Self-Cleaning Kitty Litter Boxes

Want to make poop scooping business as hands-free as possible? Check out our list of top 10 self-cleaning kitty litter boxes to find a type that will suit you and your feline friend.

Product Review: Muttluks Pawstik and Pawmagik Paw Balms

Resident skijoring expert Kev Roberts is always on the prowl for products that help his dogs perform their best and keep them comfortable during the harsh Wi…

Poodle

A lot of people have fun with their Poodle and enjoy the grooming that its coat requires as just another way to spend quality time with the dog they love.

Chiweenie

A cross between a Chihuahua and Dachshund, the Chiweenie is one cute pooch. Long and small, this adorable hybrid is picking up in popularity.

Best Dog Paw Protectors

Dog paw protectors keep your pet''s sensitive paw pads protected from the harsh weather elements, road conditions, and potential injuries.

Are Anti-Vaxxers To Blame for Rise in Canine Parvo Cases?

Vets are worried about the increased rates of confirmed canine disease parvo cases, and believe it''s due to a growing anti-vax movement in pet owners.