Ask the Hairy Dogfathers: Poetic Poop

Published A Few Days Ago
ADVERTISEMENT

What’s a bard to do when her kids won’t pick up the dog’s poo? The Hairy Dogfathers put feather-quilled pen to paper in order to offer some refined advice.

Hello Hairy Dogfathers,

I have taken a minute to pen my problem in pose. I hope you get some enjoyment out of my predicament… but seriously, I need some advice!

My Problem in a Poem

Kids A, B and C

Told their Mom (that’s me!)

If they were allowed a pet,

That I could bet,

The poo would be gone.

I was guaranteed a clean lawn!

But spring has riz,

And I know where the dog poo is…

I am beyond angry,

They have lied to me!

What do I do with this hound?

I would hate to return him to the pound!

-Signed, I’m Pooped!

Related:5 Reasons Why You Should Always Pick Up Dog Poop

Our first poetic predicament! Thanks for being so creative with your question. Sounds like your kids have been naughty and have pulled a fast one by you… or should maybe I should say a slow one because seems they might have been fooling you for the whole winter season. You could put your creativity to work to think of a suitable punishment… or you could just go with the obvious. Think about it: a dog owner’s spring cleanup can be tedious task, thankfully you have three helpers… or should I say doers! That’s right – get the three little shits to clean up their own mess! On top of that you might consider making yard cleanup part of their daily or weekly routine, each of them being responsible for cleanup on a certain day of the week. That way your yard stay clean and the hound can stay out of the pound.

Related:Is Poop Getting In The Way Of Picking Up?

A poem – oh, that’s awesome! Such a creative person can no doubt dream up a punishment that will fit the crime for children who do not hold up their end of a bargain! Goodbye iPads? Allowance goes to cover the cost of a professional pooper scooper? Grounded until the grass is green? I might sound like a glutton for punishment, but I am taking the dog’s side here!

I understand you are frustrated, but keep in mind this isn’t the dogs fault! Put the blame squarely on the kids. You can see this as a learning opportunity for them; they can see it as punishment. But the bottom line: the dog needs a clean yard. You are the adult, so what you say goes.

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

You May Like

Jackshund

The Jackshund (Jackweenie) is a designer dog created by crossing the Jack Russell Terrier with a Dachshund. This is an energetic dog with a sweet nature.

How to Clicker Train Your Cat

You''ve heard about clicker training for dogs, but did you know that it''s used to train cats? Here are some tips if you''re going to clicker train your cat.

Best Harnesses For Your Pomsky

Harnesses can help pet parents keep their Pomskies safe (and stylish!). Here are our picks for the Top 10 Harnesses for your Pomsky.

American Hairless Terrier

Although a new breed, the American Hairless Terrier has gathered quite a fan club in its few decades of existence. It is an intelligent working breed.

Best Dog Sunglasses

Dog sunglasses are not just a fad accessory- they help keep your pet''s vision 20/20 both in the long run and in the glaring sunlight.

Take A Close Look – Study Shows That Dogs Look Like Their Owners

Scientists have finally uncovered just what it is that makes dogs look like their owners. Turns out, it’s all in the eyes. Sadahiko Nakajima, a psychol…

Foxface Rabbitfish

The foxface rabbitfish is a popular species of saltwater fish belonging to the rabbitfish family. When stressed, they can change to a mottled brown color.

Scottish Deerhound

Heralded as the ""Royal Dog of Scotland"", the Scottish Deerhound is elegant, graceful and regal. He is a true gentleman and is a calm and polite dog.

Jealous Great Dane Doesn’t Want To Share The Love [Video]

Science has recently proven that dogs get jealous, too (tell us pet parents something we don’t already know!). This Great Dane hilariously shares his d…

Upside Down Dog Of The Week – Dusty

Our Upside Down Dog of the Week for Upsidedowndogs.com proves that it certainly is a dog’s life. Meet Dusty, a 7-year-old male Golden Retriever from Ph…

DentaDish Dog Bowl Stops Bloat and Brushes Teeth

Some dogs won''t let you near their teeth with a brush - what''s a pet parent to do? The new DentaDish may help keep your dog''s clean and healthy.

Best Must-Have Dog Mom Gifts

Dog (and pet) Moms deserve recognition, too! That’s why we’ve put together this list of Must-Have Dog Mom Gifts.

Green Cheeked Conure

Sharing many similarities with some of the more common and popular conures, Green Cheeked Conure is equally silly but much more tempered and calmer.

No More Slip ‘N’ Slide: ToeGrips Help Dogs Get A Grip

Is hard-surface flooring your dog''s greatest nemesis? Dr. Buzby''s ToeGrips helps your dog get a grip on mobility issues with a cool traction solution.

Common Musk Turtle

The Common Musk Turtle is known as the Stinkpot Turtle because they can emit an offensive, foul odor. They make great pets when handled properly.